I'm glad it made you laugh. It was a fun chapter to write. I"m enjoying Fez a lot. He's crazy. 

I have not read it, not personal I just don't like reading much, but I must say the cover, I admire, a true masterpiece!!!

                                                                              BAL

Thought I show you who I see when I'm writing. You'll meet Bru, Bal and Puss very soon.

CHAPTER EIGHT

“Thassa gotcha on my end. Betti you got the con. Take us on outa here.”

Pockets came over to them with an odd expression on his young face.

“What’s up?” Mook asked.

The younger Nere held out another empty F-Rat pouch.

Fez looked at it and stood. “You know wut?” he said, his voice low. “I think we done got us a stowaway.”

“Fez we don’t have time to hunt for them, we’re practically to the Jump Terminal. We’ll have to find them after the jump.” Mook said equally low.

Fez nodded and sat back down. “Go check weapons locker real quick-like, Pockets. Make sure nothin’s missin’.”

“Got it,”Pockets said.

Fez frowned. “Betti how come ya didn’t tell we had a stowaway?”

I can sense nothing out of the ordinary, the intruder must be using a jammer.

Fez rubbed his chin. “Jammer makes him invisible, right?”

To me, yes Fezyr.

“Okay. Do this for me, scan th’ship for life forms and metal and find the one place you can’t see nothin’ at all. Kinda like a hole…”

You are very clever for a biological unit, Fezyr.

“I bet you say that to all the spacer boys.”

Only to my own spacer boys.

The three guys grinned at each other.

After a moment, as they pulled into the queue, Betti said, I have found such an anomaly in cabin 5 starboard.

“Busted,” Fez said under his breath. “Thanks Betti.”

Anything for my boys.

“What do you wanna do?”  Mook asked.

“Can’t do nuthin’ ‘til we’re through,” Fez said. “Then we’ll go get ‘im and drop ‘em off on Ipalya.”

Mook nodded. Pockets came back and said, “Nothing missing from weapons. I locked the door.”

“Okay, buckle in for jump, kid.” Mook told his brother.

*   *   *   *   *

“We’re next,” Mook said. “Everybody ready?”

“Yep.” Fez said.

“Me, too,” Pockets replied.

“Now Pockets, I know you never been through one a’these,” Mook told him. “Gonna make you feel a little queasy the first coupla times.”

“I can handle it. Thanks for the heads up, Mook.”

“Yeah just be glad you ain’t a Bastaani,” Fez laughed. “Jump messes with their inner ear, makes ‘em sick as s***. They hafta take pills before they jump. I think it messes with Elvies too.”

“Wonder what our Stowaway is,” Mook said to Fez.

“Well if he’s Bastaani or Elvie, we’ll know right soon.”

Mean Betty. Advance to Jump Terminal.

“Aye-aye,” Mook responded.

In three, two, one…

Betti entered the terminal and shot into jump space. The boys all swiveled their chairs and looked down the hall to cabin 5. Pockets rubbed his stomach and grimaced a little.

They didn’t have long to wait, the cabin door flew open and a young Bastaani staggered out and stumbled into the latrine.

“Well…” Fez looked at his crew. “That was easy. We got us a pussy-cat.”

*   *   *   *   *

Once they came out of jump, the boys unbuckled and strolled to the latrine. They leaned in the doorway and observed said Bastaani, draped over the toilet.

“How you feelin’?” Fezyr asked.

“I…I don’t know what happened…I was fine then all of a sudden I got sick,” the cat said miserably. “I think I’m dying.”

The crew laughed. “You’re not dying, we just went through a Jump Terminal. Heard they give you guys a hard time.” Mook said.

“Oh.” The cat lifted his head. “So I’ll live?”

“Yep,” Fezyr said pulling him up. “Fer a few minutes anyway.”

“Please don’t hurt me,” The Bastaani said. “I didn’t mean any harm…”

“Why’dja stowaway on our ship?” Fez asked. “Yer a rich kid by the cut of yer clothes. Why couldn’t cha just buy a ticket somewheres.”

“I couldn’t. They’re watching all the ports.”

“What’s your name, boy?” Pockets asked.

“Tehah. Tehah G’Lered.”

“G’Lered?” Mook said. “That’s the family name of the Bastaani Ambassador to the Federation.”

“My father,” the young cat said miserably.

“Great!  That’s just great! Now they’re gonna think we kidnapped this kid!” Fezyr roughly pulled him closer by the collar. “I oughta ransom yer ass! Or kill it!”

“Please don’t hurt me, Captain Sphenglys. I just needed to get away!”

“Wut’s so f***in’ tough about yer life, rich kid? What’re you runnin’ from?”

“Everything,” Tehah said. “Everything my father is.”

Fezyr sat him down at a table in the lunch nook off the galley. “Talk.”

“You think being rich is everything? You think we don’t have problems? My father wants me to follow in his footsteps. Be some suit, some ambassador, spend my life on politics behind a desk. It’s not what I want. My life should be my own.”

“What do you want?” Pockets asked.

“I wanted to join the academy, I wanted to be like Murfee Maguffyn.”

When Mook and Pockets looked at Fez he said, “Captain of the OGF Explorer Class starship, theVenture.” He supplied. “He was the first Bastaani starship captain in the fleet.”

“But my father forbade it. So…”

“So you ran away,” Fez finished for him.

“Please don’t make me go back. If you ransom me, he’ll block any way I have to get away. I’d sooner be dead!”

“So you wanted to become a starship captain?” Fez asked.

“That might have been nice, but mainly I just wanted to get out here. I wanted to serve on a ship that travelled to other worlds. I want to see what’s out there, explore the galaxy.” The cat’s voice became excited.

“What’re we gonna to with him, Fez?” Pockets asked. “He sure should have a right to pick his own destiny. And we’re not kidnappers!”

“Dude, that’s what you did when you stowed away on my freighter years ago. You took off for the stars.”

“Please let me go with you, I’ll work hard! I’ll do anything you want me to! Please!”

“We gotta help him, Fez! He’s like us!” Pockets said.

Fez rubbed his hands down his face. “You’d have to pull your own weight like we do. You’d have to work hard, live hard.”

Tehah nodded hopefully. “Anything!”

Fez shook his head. “Another f***in’ mouth to feed,” he said with exasperation as he got up and went to the Con.

“Yaaaaaaay!” Pockets cried.

“What?” Tehah asked looking from Aybaali to the other.

“You just got hired, kid,” Mook said.

*   *   *   *   *

Fez was sitting at one of tables eating when Tehah approached him. “Can I sit with you?” Fezyr shrugged, that wasn’t a no, so Tehah sat at the table with him. “Can I ask you a question.”

“Don’t see how I can stop ya,” Fez said.

“Well, if you told me to shut up and go away, I would do both.”

“Yeah, shut up and go away,” Fez said.

Tehah sighed and got up, Fez grabbed his wrist.  The Bastaani looked at the large hand around his arm. “What do you want me to do, Cap?”

“Sit down, Puss…I just wanted t’see if you was gonna do what you said,” Fez told him.

“What did you call me?”

“Puss. Is that okay?” Fez asked taking a sip of his ale.

Tehah thought about it, “Will that be my name, like Pockets and like Mook?”

“Yeah.”

“Puss. I like it,” The Bastaani laughed.

“Puss the ship’s cat.” Fezyr said. “What’d you wanna to ask?”

“You said we were going to Ipalya in this system?”

“Yep.”

“How soon will we get there?”

“By my reckonin’, late tomorrow afternoon. Don’t know what time it’ll be there, we may hafta cool our heels a bit til we can get what’s on the list.”

“List?”

Fezyr pulled a folded piece of paper out of his back pocket and handed it to him.

Puss looked at it for a bit. “What’s this?”

“What’s what?”

The Bastaani boy pointed to one of the items. “That one.”

“Part,” Fezyr said.

“What kind of part? For what?”

“It’s for workin on engines, Puss.”

Puss frowned. “You didn’t even look at the word.”

“Which one is it again?”

“This one,” Puss pointed to a different word.

Fez looked at it and shrugged. “Part fer an engine.”

“Captain…it says Ipalyan Fruit Squares.”

Fezyr shrugged. “I was just pullin yer furry little leg.”

“You can’t read can you?” Puss asked.

Fezyr’s top lip tightened.

“I noticed this morning you had Pockets read the list to you.”

“I was busy.”

“You were not busy, Captain,” Puss said. “You can’t read.”

“I read some,” Fezyr argued. “I went t’school for a while, ‘til I got bored.”

Puss nodded. “How long did it take you to get bored?”

“About a year. Maybe two.”

“So, in essence, you never really went to school.”

“Not too much…look what’s this got to do with anythin’?”

“Well, now that you’re in the transport business, you really should know how to read. There’ll be contracts and lists and bills.” Puss looked at the older boy. “I’d be honored if you’d let me teach you.”

“You can teach me to read?” Fezyr asked. “For real?”

“I’m pretty sure of it,” Puss said. “If you’ll let me.”

“He’s right, Fez,” Pockets said from the counter. “I don’t know how you got away with it this long.”

“All right. That’ll be about ‘nuff from the youngins.” Fezyr grumbled.

“All right, how about from me?” Mook asked coming into the room.

“Are you guys gangin’ up on me?”

“In a good way…” Pockets said.

“Look lets start with something easy,” Puss said. “Pull out your license.”

Fez got his wallet out and pulled out his papers. Puss looked at them and frowned. “Can you spell your name?”

“Uhm…F…E…Z…Y…R,” Fez spelled out slowly.

“That is nowhere on here,” Puss told him.

“What? My name HAS to be on there!  What’s in the name part?”

“Phaser.”

“That’s my name.”

“It’s not spelled like you told me, it’s spelled P H A S E R. Like a weapon.”  Puss handed the license to Mook.

“Oh s***, he’s right, Fez.”

“Well…what do they have as my last name?”

“It’s close, it’s Spangles.”

“Phaser Spangles. Not Fezyr Sphenglys…is it on all the paperwork?”

“Fraid so,” Mook said.

“Are you gonna blow?” Pockets asked, wanting to find something to hide under if Fez lost his s***.

“I don’t know yet,” Fez said. “Let me think on it.”

After a few moments Fez shrugged. “s*** I don’t even have me a birth certificate…these is the first papers I ever had with my name on them. I guess I’m Phaser Spangles now.” He finished his ale and looked at them. “Over, done with, gone. Fact is I kinda like it.”

“Done deal, then,” Mook said.

“But yeah, Puss, I’d be right obliged if you would teach me t’read and write,” Phaser stood and put his hand on the Bastaani’s thin shoulder. “Guess you better be with me if papers is presented, right Mook?”

“Sounds like a plan,” Mook said. “You assign the kid a room yet?”

“I figure he’s used to #5, right Puss?”

“You mean I will be able to sleep in the bed instead of hide in the closet? I’d be happy to have #5. It kind of looks like…”

“…a brothel?” Mook and Phaser asked.

“Well I’ve never seen one of those; I was going to say it looked very Elvrakaani.”

“Then Trinny and Ezoe decorated that room,” Pockets said with a smile. “You’ll get to meet them in a few days, they’re workin’ girls.”

Puss grinned and sighed. “That’ll be my pleasure.”

“You don’t know the half of it,” Mook winked to Phaser.

Puss is really sweet! It`s really NICe of him, to teach Fez how to read! And, now the secret is solved, why the title is "Phaser Spangles" instead of "Fezir Sphenglys"! 

And, congratz!  Well done, Cajun!

The werewolf-story sounds like another great story!

I'm awful at drawing mechanical things...but I wanted you to see a concept of the Mean Betti. Drawing on the computer with a mouse is like drawing with a bar of soap. Very difficult.

Blazing cool drawing! NICely and well done, Cajun! Thanks for showing us!

Further along in the story, she's wearing it and Phaser is snarfing her. So yes, she loved it. I made the mistake of jumping ahead to write all the way to the end and the reason I haven't posted another part is that I'm working on the next chapter I'd be putting up.

On a totally different note...As many of you all know we had a very horrible  thing happen here int he states yesterday. I refer to the massacre in the school in connecticut. 28 people dead, 20 of them children ranging from the ages of 5 -14. After I came down from the terrible shock of hearing that news, I thought about all the people I know who have kids, who would be devastated if something happened to their kids.

And I thought about Nic for a moment, having just seen his speech about Toys for Tots and illegal gun running in the same hour. And other times he's talked about children. So apparent he loves them. It must be very frightenning in these times to be a parent. Just frightening. I got landed on with both feet by a friend who said talking about my favorite movie star at this juncture was inappropriate. I told him I wasn't talking about Nic Cage the actor. I was thinking of and talking about Nic Cage the father of a school-aged child. ANY of the people who bring us our enjoyment via the big screen, making them larger than life, are still PEOPLE. Just people.  And people in this country are pretty freaked out right now.

Sorry to go all serious.

UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE

THE GALAXY ACCORDING TO PHASER SPANGLES TO BE PUBLISHED WITH ILLUSTRATIONS IN SPRING OR SUMMER OF 2014!

Enough folks have asked me to do this, so I guess I'm going to HAVE to! LOL.

When one lays out a novel, since all chapters start on an odd page, sometimes the page before it is blank. Wherever this occurs in TGAPS I will be putting in an illustration. I may also choose to drop an illustration in the middle of a chapter depending on the scene.